Faded

So, I was laying in bed last night thinking about everything going on in my life and an ex-boyfriend popped into my head. No matter how much I tried to shake the thoughts, he kept haunting me and I realized that maybe I haven't fully let go of what I had but it scares me to completely and entirely give up on someone, even if they have been gone for over a month or two. And by gone, I simply mean just left the state never to see or hear from him again. I cannot pretend like I am okay with the fact of what he did but I am okay as long as he did it for the better of himself and I truly mean that. I have no intentions of ever talking to him again, he is just a mere "friend" on facebook but other than that, I have no reason to even acknowledge his existence. I know that may seem bitch-worthy of me, but it is what it is. So anyway, to deal with my thoughts, I wrote this poem and I thought my blog readers and poetry readers would enjoy.

"Faded"

The thoughts of you beside me in bed have now faded
Replaced with an emptiness I would have often traded
So much love turned to lust, quickly eating us alive
Our hearts grew heavy, falling fast, almost love deprived.

Where you are now haunts my mind, making it hard to sleep
Remembering the promises you made, but failed to keep
Seeing you in the back of my mind causes a new fear
And hearing the song of ours seems to bring a tear.

I cannot regret or go back and undo
Even if I could, I wouldn't want to.
Here I am laying, with you still lingering here
But I wake up to see that you are far from near.

Going on without you, the days start to grow cold and long
I can't keep from wishing I could hear you sing our song
But its time for me to go and leave these thoughts at rest
Smile and turn away, looking back only to wish you the best.

http://postpoems.com/cgi-bin/displaypoem.cgi?pid=745307